Don’t be afraid to laugh!

Dancing is awkward and clunky at first! My husband and I met through dancing and have been dancing for 4 and 3 years respectively (or 5 and 4? Who’s counting!) and we always make mistakes. Have a good sense of humor about it with each other! And along the same lines…

Don’t forget to talk—about everything!

Talking while you’re dancing is going to help get rid of those jitters, believe it or not! It lets you stop thinking about the moves and just be there present with each other. Talk before you pick your song. Talk through dance classes (or your at home choreography!). Talk through your first dance, even!

My husband’s favourite conversation starter mid-dance is “so…what did you have for lunch today?” It always makes us smile and reset.

Nerves?

Everyone gets them. Go back to tip two, talk it out. A first dance or a parent-child dance is not a good fit for everyone. Getting up in front of a whole room and having to dance in front of teary-eyed aunts and uncles (who have maybe already hit that cocktail bar) isn’t easy! It can be daunting, and it might make you, your partner, your parent, or any combination of you, want to forgo tradition. Have an open conversation about wants, fears, and expectations. Come to an agreement somewhere in the middle, wherever that it. And SMILE! Whether or not you dance, it’s still your big day!

What do I wear to practice in?

First few times, it isn’t too big of a deal. You’re getting used to dancing with each other and the steps. By your third class (even without the steps fully nailed down) you both want to be wearing whatever shoes you will be dancing in for your wedding. I have some notes in the next section concerning shoes! Leggings, comfy jeans, etc. are ok for the start, too. Anyone wearing pants has it easy, pants are super forgiving. If you are wearing a dress to your wedding, consider purchasing a skirt of a similar style, length, and fit. Amazon has all sorts of goodies, and (for anyone with that big ballgown or a full a-line) invest in some crinoline for practice! If your partner steps on your dress, you will be fine, but you need to get used to stepping around in your dress. Personally, my wedding dress is a ballgown. Around lesson 4 or 5, once we had an idea of what we were doing, I began wearing a long skirt (DIY Dress skirts on Amazon are great!!!) and crinolines. I found out really quickly how I needed to dance to avoid catching myself and slipping—by slipping a lot. Trial and error is key, but practicing and recreating those variables the best you can is going to make you feel so much safer!

Shoes, shoes, shoes!

If you plan on wearing heels, your skirt or your pants are going to be hemmed in alterations to the height of you in that heel. Yes, that makes a huge difference come dance time. So many individuals wear heels for the ceremony and photos and change into flats for the reception. Your bustle will affect your train, but not your overall hemline. Keep this change in mind. You might want to keep those heels on for that first dance, just to keep your hemline at/above the floor and not pooling around you.

Also, I get asked what kind of shoes to wear a lot. It is going to be what you’re comfortable with. For anyone who looks at Amazon and sees “ballroom heels”, though, please keep in mind sole material. True dance shoes are typically made with suede soles with just will not hold up outdoors. True character shoes typically have wood bottoms that are very slippery (you can buy the same sort of protectors you’d get for red bottoms and make them less slippery). Dance shoes from stores like Burju (I love their True Nudes line) have street soles which are comfy for dancing, walking, and safe for outdoor wear, but they are stilettos. I say, try on everything, and find whatever you love. Just make sure to practice in them!

Practice everywhere!

“Practice” doesn’t mean “dedicate 30 minutes a day”. Dance in the kitchen when you’re cooking. Supermarket aisles are a great place to practice rumba walks. A minute, two minutes, you don’t even need your partner or a song. The more you practice your own steps, the better you get and the better you feel!

Take a video.

If your photographer is like me, with experience in dancing, they can probably figure out where to get those great pictures. That doesn’t mean we wouldn’t appreciate some help! Take a video of your practice so your videographer and photographer know where your best moments will be and can capture them for you!