Who is Coming?
Concerned about how to create your guest list? There are plenty of graphics on how to scratch people entirely from your list, and I certainly suggest googling for them!
Here’s my step-by-step before you get there:
Will your parents be involved in the process?
Identify with your fiancé(e) if parents will have any say in invite lists. If so, proceed to step 2. If not, proceed to step 3.
Ask parents for their invite lists.
Their invite lists should be sorted into two categories and then broken into two lists. First category: family. Second category: friends. From there, break out into A-list and B-list. A-list should only comprise of individuals they feel have to receive an invite. Remember, it’s up to you to have the conversation with them on whether or not their lists are the final say or are just general input. Their B-list should be people they’d like to come, but are ok excluding. Set your expectations with them now: either you are 100% inviting their A-list or you’re just asking them for general help in planning and you will try to respect their choices. Have that healthy conversation before things become dramatic!
Write your invite lists.
Yours should be a little more fleshed out. Between yourself and your future spouse, break your invites into 2.5 categories: Family, Friends, and Coworkers (some coworkers might migrate into friends). Those categories get broken into three lists. A-List (people you will undoubtedly invite), B-List (people you’re aiming to invite if budget and venue space allows for it), and C-List (people you’d like to invite, but you aren’t set on having them). Your A-list is the only list that needs to receive save-the-dates when the time comes.
Combine your lists!
Count up those numbers, make final adjustments, and start looking at venues!
To Plus-One or to Not Plus-One?
Rule of thumb in 2022, if they aren’t either engaged, married, or living with the person—they don’t need the plus-one. It is up to you from there if you’d like to give one to everyone else. Remember, each plus-one is an extra plate.
Hopefully this helps you painlessly situate yourself in a comfortable spot to start venue hunting and pricing catering!